Think about it: does your life and work truly represent you, or does it portray someone else's plan for you? If you are not certain, you might ask yourself how you feel about your life in general. Is it consistent with your personality, values and desires? Just to put this question into perspective, it can take a lifetime to sort this out.

If you are like most, you've spent the first part of your life figuring out what others expected of you and trying to follow suit. At some point, it occurred to you that your decisions were not all a good fit. This realization may be most evident in your career.

Perhaps your work is something you do well and meets people's expectations of you, but is not engaging. Perhaps your work is a way to meet your obligations, but it does not call on talents or abilities you find satisfying. Perhaps your work is more about someone else's dream than your own.

If any of these ideas rings true, you've probably been aware of it for some time, but have not figured out how or if you want to change.

It's often easier to continue with the familiar aspects of life, rather than face into the unknown. However, you can experience great satisfaction when you align who you are with what you do. Anticipation of a more desirable outcome can make the initial questions and confusion manageable.

Begin with four questions:

1. What aspects of my life and work truly represent me?
2. What parts do not and in what ways?
3. What are three aspects of myself (values, skills, or interests) that I'd like to see more of in my life and/or work?
4. What is one step I could take that would bring this aspect of myself more fully into my life and/or work?

Make a commitment to yourself to move forward with this step in the next month and see what happens as a result. Whatever you choose to do does not have to directly relate to the area of your life in which you desire change. You know what they say about taking small steps: they can often have a significant ripple effect.

The fact that this idea would cross your mind is not at all unusual in America. However, here in France, where I am enjoying some R&R before I lead my annual women's retreat in Provence on Sunday, it is not commonplace to change careers at midlife, or at anytime for that matter.

French students must decide on a discipline or career path at 16 or 17 years of age. The idea of an "undeclared major" in college is unheard of. One must decide on a direction early on, and that decision essentially casts their professional fate.

While Americans enjoy the cultural norm of changing jobs and professions about 4-5 times on average during their lifetime, the French tend to remain in their "métier", or profession until retirement—whether they enjoy it or not. Perhaps that is why the French put more emphasis than Americans on non-work activities over which they have more control--like vacations and eating well.

So, if a shift in jobs is in the works for you, be grateful that you are in a culture that supports this type of a life change. Perhaps you could have the best of both worlds in this transition: enjoy a change to more satisfying work as well as put adequate attention toward the non-work parts of life.

Even though I'd find it impossible to make a living here as a career counselor to the French, I have an appreciation for the balance they seem to achieve between work and life.

I've been in denial about how busy I've been. When you get into the rhythm of life's activities, you find the gear that makes it all work and you believe it's inefficient to slow down. But, eventually, the need for balance hits and you need to pay attention.

Even though I espouse vacations and regular breaks, I have not taken my own advice lately. But, like anyone, I had good reasons: a daughter's wedding to plan and execute and thankfully, a full career counseling practice.

But, I knew the pace of my life had to change and I counted on my annual séjour to the south of France as the answer. I looked forward to two weeks with no commitments before welcoming this year's visitors to my annual women\'s retreat in the quiet village of Biot, just 20 minutes from the hustle and bustle of the Riviera.

While there are familiar haunts I look forward to visiting each year and new places to beckoned me, this year, I could only think of sleeping in each morning, taking daily naps, and reading Eat, Pray, Love—a book that has been on my to do list for months.

I finished the book in two days and moved on to another, equally satisfying read: Without A Map, by Maine author Meredith Hall. Interestingly enough, both books are about deep personal journeys, although that theme was not a conscious selection on my part.

I'll admit I'm doing quite well on the sleep front too. Naturally an early riser, I was surprised to see the clock read 10:30 am for three mornings in a row. Having given into the need for more sleep, I am now back to a truer rhythm.

My days are different here, with much of my time focused in the moment and devoted to the basics of daily life: selecting food for the day's meal from nearby markets or small food vendors, preparing and savoring it. There's something restful and nurturing about tending to the basics in life.

While I realize that the South of France lends an amazing backdrop to these basic tasks, I hope I will remember the positive effects of being in the moment and attending to simple things when I return home.

--------
Email Barbara to receive information on the September 2008 Women's Retreat to Provence when details are available in January (barb@barbarababkirk.com).

People who are passionate about their work get noticed.

This past weekend, I was reminded that people who love their work can make a significant on everyone around them. An array of talented people provided services at my daughter's wedding last Saturday. It was an amazing event that was executed with an amazing attention to detail and consistent graciousness. Guests continue to contact me with gratitude and reflections on how it all came together seamlessly.

Anyone who has planned a major gathering and ended up pleased with the outcome knows that extensive planning and teamwork make it all happen. When you add professionals who feel connected to and proud of their work, the event can be extraordinary.

From the efficient and congenial event staff at The Woodlands Club and the extraordinarily talented Boston-based dance band, The Allnighters, to the creative and innovative team at FloraFauna Designs (florafaunadesigns@yahoo.com), who set an elegant, yet casual ambiance, the wedding ceremony and reception were orchestrated by people who exuded confidence in and love for their work.

Considering the fact that most of my career counseling clients seek work that they can love and feel satisfied about, it was heartening to see so many individuals who seemed to have achieved this goal in their work lives.

For those of you who also desire work that connects you with your passion, be hopeful in your search. Recognize what engages you in life and do more of it. Be wholehearted in what you do and it can have a ripple effect to your work. Before you know it, you may experience work in a new way.